Impossible. Something that can’t be done. Something that won’t be done. Something no matter what you do will never be done.  

Yesterday I officially killed impossible. 

About a month ago, 5 weeks to be exact, my friend suggested we do a couch to 5k program. I’ve blogged about this before but asking me to run was seriously like telling me to become the President of the United States. 

It was impossible. I have an over 30 year history of being physically unable to run. 

Back when I started this journey, 110 pounds ago, I was in such horrible shape that I couldn’t even walk up a flight of stairs without becoming winded. If I can’t walk.. how could I run? 

I can remember starting working out at the Y and my son asking me one day on the track to jog with him. I literally could only jog less than one side of the track without getting horribly out of breath. If I couldn’t even run .10 of a mile how could I do a 5k? 

It wasn’t that I didn’t want to do it. I literally could not do it. And I knew that. 

But being the crazy fool I am I decided to try it and as you have seen on the blog I’ve been hitting my goals. Run 60 seconds, walk 3 minutes, walk 3 minutes rest 5. 

I’m actually loving the program because it is giving me such confidence that I can beat goals. 

I hit the milestone of running 5 minutes, and hit the milestone of 8 minutes. Those incidents were hard… and I told myself I couldn’t do them. But they weren’t impossible. I knew deep down there was a chance I could do it. 

After all impossible is a pretty strong word. I don’t throw it around lightly. 

After I hit the 8 minute run I completely expected for the next challenge to be harder, something like run 10 minutes or 1 mile. I knew I was getting dangerously close to impossible. 

But I didn’t realize how close… 

Warm up walk for 5 minutes and then jog 20 minutes or two miles. 

I literally had to check my phone to see if I had skipped ahead. But I hadn’t. 

From 8 minutes to 20?? Where’s the 10? Where’s the 15? 

You want me to run 20 minutes without stopping?

Impossible. Stupid App. 

Game over. I couldn’t do that. Even though I had willpower of steel now I was no fool, I knew my limits. I knew my body could not do that. I would get too winded, my hip would hurt, I’d get a side cramp.  That number could have been run 100 miles. It didn’t matter, running two miles was impossible. 

Well it’s been fun, my little stint as runner. 

But I knew before I officially gave up I had to try. I wasn’t a quitter anymore. That I knew.  If something is impossible the least I could do is give it my best. Maybe I could run 10 minutes. That would be progress. 

It was a rainy Friday and my normal running day. I got in my car to head for the Y and snapped a quick picture. 

Me on the way to the impossible. The cloudy rainy day was a perfect backdrop for this moment. 

I thought I would fail… err wait knew I would fail and that just put me in a horrible mood. I hadn’t failed yet on this journey. I didn’t want to deal with failure. But face it… this time it wasn’t my fault. It was impossible. 
Meaning… NOT possible. Remember? 

I walked into the Y soggy from the rain. I seriously almost stopped at the front desk to tell them there was a big chance I would faint. But I didn’t. I was nervous even though it was completely optional. I didn’t have to do this. But realizing your limits is a hard pill to swallow. 

I couldn’t do this. 

I had made a playlist earlier that day with songs to fill the 32 minutes of my workout. 9 songs?? I’d be running for about 7 of those. 7? 

When I started I couldn’t even get through 1. 


But I got on. Here goes nothing. 

Warm up was 5 minutes. I did it and came up with a plan in my mind. Facing the impossible needs a plan right? So I decided if I needed to walk for a second I can. Or I would slow my speed. 

“Start Running”

My planning was interrupted my the calm voice of my app. 

At least she’s calm. 

I hit the button and turned up the speed. It’s funny but unlike my prior runs the first 2 minutes was the hardest. I couldn’t quite get my groove. My hip hurt a little. I knew right then that my fears were correct.  The first two minutes signified that my fears were correct. I couldn’t do this for 20 minutes. 

But I kept going. 

I promised myself I wouldn’t look down to watch the time. As I ran it started to get a little easier. I started running with the beat. I got into the zone of the songs. I took deep breaths every now and then to remind myself that I could breathe. I drank water and held the drink in my mouth for a few seconds. 

See you can hold your breath and run. It’s ok. 

Song after song passed. But I knew better than to think time was passing fast. This had happened to me before where I thought I was farther than I was. I convinced myself that I was only about 5 minutes in. Then I heard 

“You are halfway.” 

Halfway? No way! I just ran 10 minutes!! 

Wow. I was shocked. I was tired, don’t get me wrong, but I wasn’t dead. I had more in me. I wasn’t breathing too fast yet. No ambulance crews needed to be called.  

First round in battle impossible clearly went to me. 

But I was no fool. 10 minutes was still a long time. I knew it would get harder. 

But I kept the pace. Kept wiping the sweat from my brow. Kept breathing. I tuned out all around me. Focused just on the inspirational words of the songs. 

Don’t look down… don’t look at the time. I knew if I did and I saw a ton of time left it would get me back to doubting.

Wait one more song before you look down… just one more. 

“You have one minute left”


That is literally a sound I’ll never forget. 1 minute from making the impossible, possible. 

I finished the minute and went into my cooldown. So many emotions went though my head. I had just run a tad over 2 miles in 20 minutes. I had just run 20 minutes without stopping. And I wasn’t dead. I was tired, but standing. 

I just killed impossible. 

I looked around the fairly empty gym room, did anyone see that? 

I killed impossible! 

Of course the strangers around me didn’t notice or care. So I sent a few texts to my family and friends. People who would truly understand the power of what just happened. 

You don’t kill impossible and keep it to yourself!! 

I got off the treadmill and went upstairs to the track to cool down. As I was on the track, my son Hayden came running up to me. 

“Mom! Did you do it? Did you do it? Did you?”

It’s a pretty cool feeling telling your kid you beat impossible.

 We celebrated on that track and I bought him and my other two kids some ice cream. We had to celebrate…

It’s not everyday you kill impossible. 

I’m not sure I’ve ever been more proud of myself in my life. I know in the grand scheme of things running 2 miles on a Friday night at a YMCA is not what one would see as a life changing moment. But oh it was. 

It signified a huge change. From can’t to can. From impossible to possible. It meant I could remove those words from my vocabulary. . Those words now could not stop me. 

I killed impossible. 


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